Embracing Change: 5 Ways to Thrive in the Postpartum Season

Before I had children, the words postpartum carried very little weight. No pun intended mamas. I was utterly oblivious to what that season of life held. Lo and behold, as pregnancy tests turned positive, hormones like ocean waves shifted and swelled, and my body enveloped itself around a tiny miracle; I realized that this was a daunting chapter quickly approaching. One in which I had no experience. I didn’t know what to expect nor had the slightest clue as to how to endure its demands. With each pregnancy and birth, God gently and graciously opened my eyes to see how I could thrive in the postpartum season, as dark and delightful as that season can be.

I had three drastically different postpartum experiences. I wish I could say all of them were magical. But the reality is that two of them were fraught with many sleepless nights, anxiety, panic, and significant stress from various other circumstances unrelated to motherhood. However, despite the challenges, I learned a lot from those precious experiences, which ultimately made my most recent postpartum season miraculously enjoyable and fulfilling – a true answer to my prayers. Below are five practical things that I’ve learned that have helped me not just endure the “4th trimester” but thrive amid all the change that comes with it.

5 Ways to Thrive During the Postpartum Season

1. Minimize Time Spent on Social Media

The amount of reels, posts, stories, and TikToks related to anything motherhood is astounding. And not all of that is bad! I remember when I first gave birth to my son 6 years ago, the “social media” age was just on the cusp of worldwide popularity. Fast forward to 2023, and it’s uncommon for someone not to be active on at least one social media platform for several hours a week. Yes, social media has some positive aspects. I cannot deny the fact that I have learned a great deal from using it. But during the emotionally vulnerable postpartum period, the negative effects were undeniable.

Because of the scrolling, I unknowingly had expectations for what I thought postpartum would be like. I had visions of cute, comfy outfits for me and my infant, couch snuggling and co-sleeping, breastfeeding like a total pro, and absolutely thrilled with my birth story. Although some of that is true, the majority did not turn out that way. Disappointment and confusion tormented me for months. In time, I came to realize that those emotions surfaced because of the amount of time I was spending on my phone. I was so concerned with watching other women’s postpartum experiences that I mistakenly thought my journey would look the same. And it didn’t. I wanted to thrive in the postpartum season without being crippled with unnecessary emotions.

I remember reading a quote that said: “Wherever your feet are, be there.” Let’s take our eyes off the screens and onto the precious potential the postpartum season holds to make & mold us more into the women and mothers God has created us to be.

2. Prioritize Nutrition

I grew up thinking exercise and salads were the epitome of health. And that baby weight was fine while you’re pregnant but not so much once you’re not. So, you can imagine my mindset after bringing my first baby home. Salads did nothing but produce a gassy baby, and my 19-hour labor was enough of a calorie burn to last me for months. I needed a revelation of proper nutrition and how to break away from the pressure of ” getting my body back” right away. After much intentionality, I began prioritizing nutritious meals for myself. I slowly began enjoying it, knowing I was helping myself and my baby. This was such a huge blessing. By prioritizing nutrition, I was able to thrive in the postpartum season! Here is the cookbook I used that focuses on nutrient-dense meals that my whole family loves!

3. Make the Most of Time Margins

As a new mom six years ago, I remember wrestling with the thought, “How do some mothers do it all?” I could not grasp how one gets enough rest, food preps, thrives in their relationship with God, has a solid marriage, stays healthy, keeps an organized house, grocery shops, keeps up with laundry, serves their children, engages in social life, is committed to their local church, homeschools their children, etc. Good heavens, just writing all of that out makes me breathless, and need another cup of coffee!

I wish I could look back at postpartum, 22-year-old me and answer her question with: “God does not call us to do it all perfectly. But He calls us to steward what we have well and be wise with what we spend that time on.” Aside from leaning on the abundant strength God provides on a daily basis, the most practical advice I could give to a new mother is to aim for productivity in the small time margins you have because, in all honesty, the things that are easy to do are also easy not to do.

Back when I was in the throes of postpartum, I needed to figure out how to keep my head above water. After all, my house still needed to be organized enough to be functional. My family still needed food, and laundry couldn’t be ignored. I needed to move my body enough to keep me mobile in order to serve my family. So, I chose a handful of habits to be intentional with while being mindful of the fact that my body still needed healing. A few of them were meal planning one evening a week, walking in the evenings to get some fresh air, completing one load of laundry a day, and dwelling on short Bible verses to feed my soul.

The things I’ve chosen don’t need to be yours! What habits can you create to help you, your family, and your home thrive in the postpartum season?

4. Lean into God’s Grace

I know this might sound like it’s contradicting my last point, but I promise it’s not. While I encourage the habitual task of stewarding well, the time margins we have, I also realize that postpartum brings exhaustion like no other. It’s a season in which you give of yourself on a 24-hour basis. It completely empties you and makes sleep the only activity you long for.

“The Lord waits to be gracious to you…” (Isaiah 30:18 ESV) God “…gently leads those that are with young.” (Isaiah 40:11 ESV) Our Heavenly Father, the Creator of the world, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, longs to be gracious to you and desires to gently lead you in the season of having young. What a life-changing truth! He isn’t looking upon you in disappointment or condemnation. God wants to meet you just as you are, whether that is in the middle of the night as you bounce a fussy baby with a tear-stained face. Or in the wee hours of the morning when you’re simultaneously pumping, nursing, and probably snacking. Through His grace, each minute can be made holy because of the righteousness of Christ that rests upon us.

5. Remember Postpartum Isn’t Forever

I wish someone would have told me that the postpartum season is such a short period. I recall thinking, “Am I always going to feel this depleted and weary?” Of course, every new season brings its various challenges. And truthfully, I can only speak to what I’ve walked through and am experiencing. I still have a long journey ahead of me, with much living to do and many things to learn. But I know now that nursing isn’t for a lifetime. Changing diapers last for but a breath. Sleepless nights with a colicky infant are over in the blink of an eye. Binkies, bottles, rattles, and car seats will all too soon be memories of the past. Let’s do our best to enjoy it while we are in it.

There is a Way

I fully embraced the once-in-a-lifetime postpartum season by shifting my perspective with my last baby. God allowed me to experience the pure and utter joy of bonding with my beautiful newborn. I didn’t feel the need to rush through it and released the pressure to do it all correctly. I let go of expectations and leaned toward the natural limitations instead of anxiously running away from them. If you’re feeling lost in the darkness of the postpartum season, I wish I could give you a giant hug. Know that you aren’t alone. Know that God loves you and desires to carry you through it. Your tireless work in caring for the smallest image-bearers of God is cherished in His eyes. Every tear and desperate prayer is heard and will indeed be met with the unceasing presence of our Heavenly Father.

“A mother living well in her God-ordained role is of great beauty and inestimable value to the future generation.” -Sally Clarkson